Hit Me Baby...

Hello, blogfriends. After the dour post I made on the 11th, I decided to write about something else that greatly disturbs me: Britney Spears.

As many of you know, I was quite upset when Brit shaved off all of her hair. I have been thinking about this a lot since it happened, and I have come up with several conclusions about it.

1. She is feeling hurt and sick inside, and subconsiously wanted to look hurt and sick outside. As Alex said, Brit is the embodiment of "The American Dream". She came from a small town with nothing, and then completely took over every niche of pop culture, (I should know. I own and love her Fantasy perfume.) As we've all read in the tabloids, stardom is stressful. I know I sure wouldn't like to have every aspect of my private and personal life chronicled. After her very public divorce from K-Fed and her rampant partying with Lindsay and Paris, she said "Fuck it" and made a bizarre choice. She is hurting, and wants the world to know it.

2. She wanted media attention. Any attention is good attention, and with her career in the toilet, she wanted to create a buzz and have people look at her again. She wanted to show the world how crazy she is.

3. She wants people to think she's totally fucked up so when she releases her comeback album (fingers crossed!) and is back to the 'not-so-innocent' Brit that we know and love, everyone will applaud her for getting back on track.

Regardless of what she is attempting to accomplish with her behaviour, she is getting attention. She IS accomplishing something. If I didn't care would I be writing about it? All I know is, I don't like her music but I respect her ability to consume my thoughts while I'm laying in bed trying to fall asleep. Keep up the good work, Brit!

kjh

So If You're Crazy...

In case any ofyou haven't noticed, I've been unpredicably moody lately, swinging from being regular, happy Kayla to sullen, angry Kayla in a matter of minutes.

I figured I should probably come clean as to the reason.

As most of you know, my birthday is coming up. On March 20. Also, as most of you know, I hate birthdays. Especially this one. I know you're just thinking, "Oh Kayla, get over it", but I can't. I wish I could. I don't want to get old. I've cried myself to sleep almost ever night for about 3 weeks. And today, my mom mentioned going birthday shopping to me and I bawled for an hour.

In other words, I have been in god-awful moods because I am turning twenty. I'm surprised I'm not sobbing as I write this. I'm an emotional wreck because I am absolutely scared shitless of my birthday. I can't even put into words the dread I feel. I know it sounds silly, but it IS me, after all.

Bear with me. Hopefully I'll be better soon. Now you all know what's been going on with me. Thank you for you patience.

kjh

Trapper Keepers

Hello, blogfriends! I felt it was time for an update.

First, I would like to apologise for being so moody lately. I'm a fairly emotional person, but the past couple weeks have been a bit extreme. I don't know why I've been feeling so weird, but I'm feeling better now.

Second, I would like to thank Michelle for being an awesome friend. We had a bit of a 'falling out' but we got over it, so it's all good. Details are now irrelevant, so don't bother asking.

Anywho, things have been pretty uneventful and I don't really know what to write about (what else is new?). I'm wearing a dress over pants today and I'm feeling pretty hip. I don't usually feel hip, so I'm kind of excited.

Also, wtf is up with Britney Spears? It pretty much broke my heart when she shaved her head. I know it's lame to feel sad for celebrities, but my heart totally goes out to Brit.

Alright, I feel that is enough rambling. Peace out.

kjh

PS: Download:

Radiohead - We Suck Young Blood
Aquabats - Pool Party

Lover, I am loveless.

*deleted*

I was in a bad way. Disregard this.

kjh

Update for Jordan.

FINE! I'll update.

Ok, here goes...

Kayla=single (whoo!)
School = good
Dance = good

That's pretty much it. I am a very boring individual. Oh, the song "Girlfriend" by Avril Lavigne was totally written for me. Here are lyrics:

Hey! Hey! You! You! I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way! I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You! I could be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know that you like me
No way! No way! No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You! I want to be your girlfriend


You're so fine
I want you mine
You're so delicious
I think about ya all the time
You're so addictive
Don't you know what I could do to make you feel alright?
Don't pretend I think you know I'm damn precious
Hell yeah I'm the motherfucking princess
I can tell you like me too and you know I'm right
She's like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that's what everyone's talking about!

Hey! Hey! You! You! I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way! I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You! I could be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know that you like me
No way! No way! No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You! I want to be your girlfriend

I can see the way, I see the way you look at me
And even when you look away I know you think of me
I know you talk about me all the time again and again
Now come over here, tell me what I want to hear
Better yet make your girlfriend disappear
I don't want to hear you say her name ever again (And again and again and again!)


She's like so whatever
You could do so much better
I think we should get together now
And that's what everyone's talking about!


Hey! Hey! You! You! I don't like your girlfriend!
No way! No way! I think you need a new one
Hey! Hey! You! You! I could be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know that you like me
No way! No way! No it's not a secret
Hey! Hey! You! You! I want to be your girlfriend
In a second you'll be wrapping around my finger
Cuz I can, cuz I can do it better
There's no other
No one can this thing, I can
She's so stupid
What the hell were you thinking?!

Holy Kayla song. w3rd. Peace.

kjh

Summer Shudder

Listen when I say, when I say it’s real.
Real life goes undefined, why must you be so missable?
Everything you take, makes me more unreal.
Real lines are undefined, how can this be so miserable?

Under the summer rain I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) you turned away

Listen, I can't make, make a sound or feel
Feel fine, I kissed the lies. Why must they be so kissable?
Listen as I break, break the fourth wall's seal.
Gorgeous eyes shine suicide, when will we be invisible?

Under the summer rain I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) we burnt away
Under the summer rain I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) you turned away

This is the fall, this is the long way down
And our lives look smaller now, and our lives look so small.
(Let me hear you crying)
This is the fall, this is the long way down
And our lives look smaller now, and our lives look so small.

Under the summer rain I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) we burnt away
Under the summer rain I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) we burnt away

Under the summer rain (burn!) I burnt away
Under the summer rain (burn!) you turned away

Two Weeks in Hawaii

You've got your airplane
And I've got the plain air of here
You're gone and I've gone insane
Oh when will you reappear
I'm just some new kid
Who can't get his mind off of you
And I know that it's stupid

Cause you've got Hawaii
And I've gotten no letters from you
I should stop whining
Cause its only been a day or two...
I don't know what you did
But you got me to fall for you
I know its stupid

Your family's rad and I
Wish that they were here today
But they're thousands and thousands of miles away
I felt so bad when your mom
Caught us eating ice cream in your
Room at three in the morning
Cause I'd hate for her
To not want me around her daughter cause my heart stops every time

You've got Polaroid
And you even know how to rhyme
I'd be overjoyed
If we could just hang out sometime
I don't know what you did
But you got me to fall for you
And I know that its stupid
But you know that I try

Your drawing's rad and I
Put in on my wall and I made
Sure it wouldn't fall cause if it did
My straw wrapper might tear
And there would be no knot and I would
Feel like I'd been shot right through the heart
And I'd fall apart but I'd remember how
My heart stops every time

You are so special
I just hope that we can be friends
I'll wait forever
But I guess that it all depends
On you and yours
So come on and dance with me
Cause you are so special

I hope that this makes you smile
And you might stay that way for a while
Cause you deserve every grin that you get
And you'll get em a lot from me
Uh ho, uh ho

You are so special
I just hope that we can be friends
I'll wait forever
But I guess that it all depends
On you and yours
So come on and dance with me
Cause you are so special

And my heart stops every time

Super Freak!

English: This post is going to be typed as a 12-year-old AOLer would write it. Not much is really new with me, other than school, work, and dance. It is kinda sucky. Oh well. School is pretty neat. We are learning about Anarchy in my Philosophy class which is pretty baddass. I don't really have much else to say.

AOLer: THES POST SI GONG 2 B TYP3D AS A 12-YAAR-OLD AOLER WUD WRIET IT!!11111! WTF LOL NOT MUCH SI RILLY NU WIT ME OTH3R THAN SKOOL WORK AND DANCE!!!!!1 OMG WTF IT SI KINDA SUKY!1111!!! LOL O WEL!!1!11 LOL SKOOL SI PRATY NAAT!!1!1!!! WTF LOL W3 R LEARNNG ABOUT ANARCHY IN MAH PHILOSOPHY CLAS WHICH SI PRATY BADAS!!!!1!!1! LOL I DONT RILLY HAEV MUCH 3LSA 2 SAY!!1!!! WTF

The site for this translator is> http://ssshotaru.homestead.com/files/aolertranslator.html

Enjoy!

kjh

Radiohead - Creep

When you were here before
Couldnt look you in the eye
Youre just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
Youre so fuckin special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

I dont care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When Im not around
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.

Shes running out again,
Shes running out
Shes run run run running out...

Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
Youre so fuckin special
I wish I was special...

But Im a creep, Im a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I dont belong here.
I dont belong here.

All you sucka MCs ain't got nothin' on me!

Ok. New post time. Nothing new is really happening. I am, however, very excited to go to the Saskatchewan Youth Summit with Jae and Nathan as well as volunteer at Telemiracle with Jae and Nate. It should be a fantastic time.

As many of you know, my birthday is coming up. March 20, to be exact. This greatly depresses me. I will be turning 20, which is far too old. On the day of my birth, I shall get obnoxiously drunk and cry the entire night. You have all been warned.

Anywho, I'm doneskis. I'm sorry, Jordan. I know it is the shortest thing ever. Please continue to love me as you always have.

xoxo
kjh

These Hands Were Meant To Hold

Shalom! Long time no type! My winter break was awesome. For the most part. Apart from a few 'incidents' with Tyson and I, things were swell. I partied and worked lots, which ruled. I don't really know what else to type. I have nothing of interest to say. Maybe I'll try again later. Peace out, A-Town!

kjh

PS: Jordan and Alex are toootally the hottest guys around.

Heartattack in a layby.

I'm done. Finally. School stress = gone. Work is going well, dancing is almost done, and well, I guess we'll see how my relationship fairs. He's gone again until Friday. This really sucks. Anywho, you've all heard me complain enough about this.

I'm stoked for tomorrow. Dorian and I are going to watch South Park, Jerry Springer, and the Playboy channel aaaalllll day. It'll be very fun.

Well, that's enough of an update for you people. Tah!

kjh

The Modern Things

One final down, two to go! Well, I ahve one in approx. 2.5 hours, so that one is *pretty much* done. I'm very excited for being done school. I've been so very stressed and snappy and moody lately. I miss stupid, asshole Tyson way too much. It sucks. Oh wells. I'll see him on the 17th. Such is life.

After everyone is done finals we should all go out and do something awesome. Like drunk bowling. Drunk bowling rules. Anywho, back to studying! Tah

kjh

A Number, Not A Name

I hate missing people. I seems as though I'm always missing and never missed. Tyson is probably going to stay in Kindersley for another week, and while I understand it is a fantasic opportunity to make a ton of cash, I can;t help but be selfish and want him to be HERE with ME. I know that is a flaw of mine. I'm selfish. Tyson is selfish, too, and that is why we argue sometimes. We're both princesses and both used to always getting our own way. Oh well. I like him lots anyway.

Anywho, I have a final tomorrow. Political Studies, to be exact. It should be fairly easy and I'm not too worried. I finally finished all those fricking essays I had, which is a relief. I seriously can;t wait until my last final is over. I'm so very stressed. Well, I'm out. Tah.

kjh

Begin Again

So, finals are almost upon me. 8, 9, 12. Watch out, liver! On the 12 the punishment shall begin. I miss drinking. I know I'm coming off like an alcoholic, but I'm really not... I promise. I'm really stoked for xmas break. I want to just cuddle up to a certain someone and doze in front of a fire... holy romantic and sappy. Whatever. I'm allowed to be romantic and sappy sometimes. However, if my romantic and sappy quota start getting too high, someone needs to bring me back with a well place insult, or something.

Well, that was a fantastic ramble. Goodnight.

kjh

Copycats

I have decided to compile a list of the best song covers. Behold!

The Postal Service - Against All Odds (Phil Collins cover)
The Postal Service - Such Great Heights (Iron and Wine cover)
Reel Big Fish - Take On Me (A-Ha cover)
Death Cab For Cutie - All Is Full of Love (Bjork cover)
Johnny Cash - Hurt (Nine Inch Nails cover)
Erasure - Take A Chance On Me (Abba cover)
The Rolling Stones - Love In Vain (Robert Johnson cover)
Marianne Faithful - Ruby Tuesday (Rolling Stones cover)
Jimi Hendrix - All Along The Watchtower (Bob Dylan cover)
The Silver Jews - Friday Night Fever (George Strait cover)
Cat Power - (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction (Rolling Stones cover)
Gary Jules - Mad World (Tears For Fears cover)

That is all for now. If I think of more I'll add them later.

It doesn't have to be perfect..

This is just a quick thank you/I'm sorry post. Thank you to everyone who has been putting up with my emo and terrible mood lately, and I'm sorry to you guys, too. You know who you are. Things have just not been going well for me lately, and you have stood by me while I bitched, moaned, sulked, and moped. I appreciate it. Come December 12, things should be looking up for me, at least in most aspects of my life. Hang in until then, and I promise I'll be back to the Kayla you know and love. Merci beaucoup!

<3kaylajean

I would like to use a pencil but it's just not permanent

Well, school is almost over. Praise be to Allah for that. Holiday break should be awesome. Maybe then all of us can actually see eachother. I'm writing in short, crappy sentances. It's ok though. I like it today. It's far too cold outside. I wish it was summer. Summer was amazing. Best summer of my life. I don't want to be at school right now. I miss cuddling. I want finals to be over so I can do that more. Being the busiest girl ever sucks. Dancing is pissing me off. I hate pretty much everyone there. I need a break from that, too. It's all good though. Hopefully I'll get some time off. I want to get out of the city. It is depressing me. I've been really miserable lately. I know how you feel, Alex. Pretty much everything kind of sucks right now. Hopefully things will get beter.

Sick Of You

Fuck you, school! I'm so fucking sick of sitting here trying to transcribe a conversation for a goddman research project! I'm sick of having to sit through boring lectures and try to stay awake! I'm sick of trying to study for tests! Gah! I'm going nuts here! *shoots self in face*

Preacher Crawling

I dream sometimes of a brother in red.
The first unborn.
Perhaps the son of god aborted and tossed and a garbage bag.
Life is black comedy.
Slapstick and vulgarity.
Unworthy of the name.
I still remember where mine went so wrong.
My last night in sodom and my first morning in hell.